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Hi everyone!!! Its been a hot minute but Scott and I are still here. We are still doing carnivore (with a day or two ketovore here and there) and I am feeling a bit better. I had been pretty sick for a bit and still working on some health things (nothing that carnivore created for those who are going to think that). I was informed that someone is scamming people about some charity, please know that I am STILL away so any comment/etc is NOT me. I have not asked for $ nor will I for charities etc. Fingers crossed ill be back and up to coming back sooner then later but that is still a bit up in the air. No matter I shall be back though! Hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season and is doing well, remember no matter if you fell off, just get right back on <3

ps. Scott and the doggos say HI! 

Hi everyone, I hope y'all have been having a wonderful summer. Scott and I are excited about the next chapters and I am beyond glad I have taken this time to grow and strengthen who I am and what I see on the inside not just outside. I truly look forward to sharing the insights and self reflection that I have found! To finish this I’ll be away a few more months but will see yall soon! Love you all <3 

Hi everyone!! Just wanted to pop in and give a quick update. I am doing better, thank you for all the kind thoughts (even though I still haven't read many as I am still taking a bit of time away from all social media)! Its been a bit of a roller coaster over here from getting a nasty head cold turn pneumonia recently and I am now walking that uphill battle of recovering. Overall though things are going well, I have been focusing on understanding what I thought were flaws like wearing my heart on my sleeve, and finally understand its what makes me, who I am. With that said, the plan is to come back full force end of August/early September to YT! There are still a few things I need to workout inside to ensure this doesn't happen again and it just takes time dealing with old scars that I never addressed in the past. I hope everyone of you is having a WONDERFUL summer and remember each of us has value beyond what we think and know, we NEVER know how our very existence will impact the world making it a more loving and wonderful place for those around us <3

p.s. Scott says to say "HI" and talk with y'all soon!! 

I write this with a heavy heart. I have been silently breaking inside for a while.
 

Yesterday was the final crack in the vase that is Amanda, I wanted to end my life, the suffering has gotten too much for me to bear.

I want to thank those of you who have had such kind words and have found value in my sharing, I hope you can forgive me as I am not as strong as you had hoped. I can no longer tolerate the death by 10,000 papercuts. Something as innocuous as “no video this week” gets turned into “you aren’t carnivore, you aren’t doing things right, your channel has run its course…….”, some of you might even be disappointed that I can’t just ignore the negativity. On its face, a single comment has no impact, yet the summation of them all has crushed my spirit, being constantly accused of not doing things 'correctly' , lying or unmet expectations. I have never pretended to be unflawed or perfect on my journey. 

People seeing someone struggling and instead of offering a helping hand or kind word they choose to kick them, to revel in the added suffering and malice that exists.  I can admit I still harbor nativity inside myself, that deep down people do not want to hurt others yet on a day-to-day basis I am proven wrong. I’ve yet to rectify that part of myself to the reality that is this world, I know evil exists, we can see it in history in current events, the fact that slavery still exists in this world as well as labor camps and beyond.  Yet I want to believe that when we aim to help others (even ourselves in the progress) that evil cannot co-exist, yet it does. Many will hide behind the sentiment of “I was just telling the truth”, yet we both know it comes from a place of malice. We all have it in us, the ability to harm, be unkind and be full of hate. I wear my heart on my sleeve, I have tried to change this about myself, be “stronger, ignore the hate, be Teflon”, but I am not. I cannot pretend to be something I am not anymore, push down the pain, sadness and suffering for the sake of ‘pretending’ it should not bother me. It does and ignoring it has led to not wanting to exist in this world anymore. So, I am stepping away for a while, I do not know for how long, I just know I cannot be guilted or shamed by one more person assuming something about me or what is left will be so far broken there is nothing to be pieced back together. 



I wish the world to each and everyone of you. 

Hi everyone, no video this week things are quite busy on our side and some difficult news from my MRI but I shall be back next week! 

Hi everyone, going to try to get at least the weekly update done for tomorrow, still experiencing on/off low grade fevers, swollen lymph nodes and green stuffs. Scott thinks its long c*vid since this seems to be a constant trend the past while of doing fine then out of the blue being run over by a bus sick, who knows. Any who, hope you are doing well 

No video today, this cold is still kicking my butt 

Hi everyone! I haven't had the chance to edit my weekly update video yet today Sooo it will be tomorrow before I can get it out! 

HI everyone!! I FINALLY have Aprils Meet-Up planned, I hope to see you there!!

 https://www.carnivorousme.com/event-details-registration/april-20th-meat-up 

Hi yall!! You may notice a bit of change to the format, Scott and I are trying to tweak what works well for us. Im most likely going to do a weekly aggregated vlog as well as few other help ones! please let me know if there is anything specific you'd like to see!!